Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Seriously...what's a momma to do?

Emma's first few months of life were rather difficult, as I've said before. Nothing serious, but the child just had a bad case of acid reflux that she inherited from her daddy. It made for long nights and crying fits that would last for hours at a time. Enter Zantac. It changed our lives. I know a lot of people say in jest that certain products changed their lives, but this literally changed our lives. Emma turned into this sweet little girl that smiled and cooed. No longer were her little hands constantly clutched in two tight fists. To this day, I swear the girl has great abs because of all the time she spent tightening and loosening those muscles screaming her head off. Anywho, all of that to say she has been a very easy (ok, so maybe a little vivacious) toddler. However, these last couple weeks she has morphed into this little devil-child. Overall she's still my sweet little girl, but man does she have a temper.

She's been throwing the most ridiculous tantrums I've ever seen for no apparent reason. Now, maybe I'm just still in new-mom-to-toddler mode and can't read the signals, but sheesh, I'm not a mind reader. For instance, she fell asleep in the car around 11ish today, so I took her up to bed where she slept for another thirty minutes. She woke up happy as a lark, yelling, "Mooooommmyyy, MOoOOmMMy!!!" Always a good sign. As I was folding laundry, I had her come into my room and hang out. I asked if she wanted to eat. "Nooooo," was her reply. Ok. I continued to fold my laundry. A few minutes later I asked her if she wanted to read a book to which she nodded her little head fervently. I grabbed three books and had her pick one out for us to read together. Annnnd, for some reason, this made her terribly angry. I mean, she grabbed a book and started thrashing it around and threw herself to the floor kicking her legs and tossing her head from side to side, all the while screaming at the top of her lungs.

What the heck?? Where'd that come from?

Being the super even-tempered mom that I am (for the first three minutes of a temper tantrum), I sat on the floor and gently asked her again to bring the book to me. The tantrum continued...and continued. I tried to coax her out of it, but she would have none of my mommy-nurturing. So, I continued my laundry. After finishing it up, I brought the screaming child downstairs to attempt a nice lunch. She calmed down as I put on a DVD that my mom had made of her cousins set to music. As I made the sandwiches it looked like we were heading towards a better day.

Until she walked over to me in the kitchen.

I offered her a sandwich bite to which she threw herself down on the floor and started banging her head on the linoleum. Lucky for her we can't afford tile. Seriously, where did that come from?? What am I missing here? This continued on for way too long until I brought her up to flip out in the comfort of her own room.

During this time, I went to the source of all parenting knowledge, Google, and looked up toddler tempter tantrums. Um, the main points, stay calm (got it), know the triggers (uumm, reading books and eating lunch??), and bring to a safe location such as a bedroom (yes!) and stay there with her (really?). This is all you've got for me, Google?? I left the computer disappointed, and checked on her a couple times while she continued her fit. Finally, I got her to climb into my arms and take a bottle, which she never takes in the middle of the day. So, now she sleeps and I write, while I should clean.

Yesterday we had a similar tantrumific day, and Matt looked around the messy house and asked, "Huh...what'd you do all day?" Obviously I must have done something since the house was such a mess. But nope, I had nothing. Apart from a trip to the Y, I stayed in all day to clean. In fact, I actually did clean the house, but crazy girl had interrupted enough projects with her tantrums for me to only half-finish everything. Eeeeh.

So please, help a crazy motha out. Why has my child been such a psycho lately, and what can I do??


Katie & Tim said...

hey kelly, this is katie nester. i just stumbled across your blog (on facebook) and i thought this post was hilarious (albeit, annoying for you!).
cale didn't necessarily go through THIS exact phase, but when he did throw fits for no reason, i was just as baffled.
looking back at 15 months, kids are starting to test their boundaries. cale was PARTICULARLY stubborn with what he would eat. and after months and months of stressing over what to make him, and how to get him to eat, i'm realizing that he will eat if he's hungry and sleep if he's tired.
perhaps it's time to take her down to 1 nap. i think i started the transition then and by 18 months it was 1 nap only.
my only other thoughts are this: breathe. relax. it will pass. every crazy phase eventually does. cale now eats salads, tuna casserole, meatloaf and steak. go figure.
good luck honey!!!

Katie & Tim said...

sorry, i meant to tell you that i think you are ALREADY doing the right thing. most toddlers throw tantrums because they are frustrated. they are frustrated that THEY can't do something themselves, or that WE don't understand what they want/need. this might sounds like you're giving in to her, but try to distract her. she may forget about why she was upset altogether. hang in there.

The Olsen Family said...

I wish I had an answer for you but I'm still stuck on trying to get my 5 month old to like people besides her mother!!

Momma Wild said...

Kaie- Yeah, I've heard the "they'll eat when their hungry, sleep when they're tired" thing...it's just so hard to actually do! I've had trouble with her eating too lately...grrr. It can be so frustrating! The thought of a second during this phase just seems to hard! Not that we're pregnant btw. :) How's the adoption process going?? Do you do most updating about it through facebook?
Alyssa- ha- that's funny b/c Em was the total opposite. She loooves getting a break from her momma...sometimes it even makes me a little sad!

Anonymous said...

Kelly this just makes me laugh every time I read it. Does the term "like mother like daughter ring a bell"? I can't tell you how many times your dad would say (in the middle of a tantrum) ..."Dyann, I think there is something wrong with her....No really...I think there is something seriously wrong with her...it's just not normal!" The boys never had tantrums and Dad couldn't understand why he couldn't reason with you. We would just put you in your room, close the door and wait it out.......
Look how well you turned out! :-) I miss little Em. BTW, I've never seen a tantrum from that little angel. You sure you're not dreaming?